A few years ago I adopted a phrase that’s simple and often used as a joke, “I do what I want.” At first using this phrase was just a fun way of being sassy and letting people know I liked having my way. But in the last year it became more serious. It evolved from a girlish power phrase to a factual statement. I began using it as a warning to people that I was fully capable of making my own decisions and not was easily affected by peer pressure.
I had become tired of people telling me what to do. And by people I mean people who I did not have close connections with. If I had a quarter for every time someone gave me a piece of unwanted relationship advice, or pointed out every flaw in my well thought out future plans I’d be a millionaire. I also grew tired of people telling me how to feel especially in relationship settings. It wasn’t just individuals either. The whole world was telling me how to feel and be in a relationship and when I couldn’t live up to those expectations I felt horrible and even hated some things about myself I never should have hated. So I started fighting back. It took sometime but finally I realized that there were good things about myself that society said were going to get me nowhere. That’s when saying “I do what I want” changed.
When I tell people that “I do what I want” now I am saying that I can make decisions and live with the consequences. I am taking ownership of my actions. Also I am saying that I trust myself and love the parts about me that are often shut down. It’s not a phrase to prove I’m tougher than you or more confident. It’s simply a statement letting people know that I take myself seriously and when I truly need guidance I will seek it from those closest to me.
I encourage you to think about if you do do what you want. Do you take responsibility for your actions? Or do you blame the world and the people around you for the consequences? Do you love the good, amazing parts of yourself? Can you trust your thought process and the decisions you make? If you feel that most of your choices are made because of what others have said to you have no fear. All of us have been in positions where we don’t do what we want. But with practice and a true desire to do the right thing you too can say with confidence “I do what I want.”